Joy

For most of my life, even saved, I've thought that joy was found in a destination, in a person, a new something and I've always ended up disappointed. Walked away empty.

I ebbed and flowed with circumstances.  In those peak moments living excited. Fully alive... only to crash into depression, or disappointment when back home or familiar or old. 

I lived for the when. When these boys grow up, when I'm finished homeschooling, when i move to the mission field, when my children love the Lord with all their hearts, when we go on furlough, when I get pregnant, when the baby's born, when the adoptions are finished, when i get a bigger house, when I loose weight, when they're all married, when we go on vacation, when when when...... always "when" 

I've missed chunks of life always looking. The hand positioned at the forehead in search.

It wasn't until recently that I've realized that joy is a condition of your heart, it's a disposition that you can attain through having a thankful heart in ALL THINGS and a heart that trusts Him in ALL THINGS. It's living in His grace. Soaking up the rain, embracing adversity, seeing Him in your dry circumstances. Seeing that there's always a well. For those in search of water, there's always a well. 

"Oh the joys of those who trust the Lord" Ps 40:4

"May the God of Hope fill you with all joy as you trust in Him, SO THAT YOU MAY OVERFLOW" Romans 15:13

One author says, "The secret to JOY is to keep seeking Him in the place we doubt He is" She adds, "Inserting VERBAL gratitude into stressful situations is almost like being healed of mental blindness. I've begun to see again! The human experience is the sum of what the soul sees and I see exactly what I attend to and what the eyes focus on is what the life is"  (emphasis added)

Our lives are what we make of them.  "We don't have to change what we see, we have to change the way we see." 

Oh to live on higher ground. I've started an ascent. I've not arrived there yet, but my vision has been lifted. There are lights on all around me. Scriptures written on my bare walls brings life to my soul. Trusting Him. Giving verbal gratitude in the most ridiculously hard situations. My husband looked at me in awe  last week as I gave thanks out loud to a rebellious heart that was spewing out hurtful words. He began giving thanks too. It's contagious. 

Do you need to come up with me? Do you want to come up? Try it. Try to give thanks as many times a day as you can remember. Give thanks when things are hard. Look for Him in your laundry. Look for him in your messy house. Look for him in the face of your crying baby. Look for him in the face of those who are hard to live with. Your dirty, hot house. Your squabbling children. In your lonliness. In your empty bank account. You fill in the blank.

Look for Him and thank Him in the ugly and messy situations of life. Thank Him instead of complain. See what will happen. 

Give thanks in ALL things today.

Love Amber