Disappointments That Cut Deep

I just hung up the phone from our social worker in Bangkok, the one who handled Bank's case and who is now handling Joseph's case.

Back in November, she told me to call in January to see if we could have our board meeting.

I called today in hopes that we would indeed get an appointment.

But again, my hopes were dashed as I listened to her tell me that my paper work needed to be translated and we had to get on the books for an appointment and she didn't get our paper work from Songkhla (our province) until December and I have to be jai yen yen (calm down) and and and......as she spoke her voice became a murmur and I couldn't even hear anything she was saying. 

I felt disappointment hit me like a thick wave. Tears began to stream down my face, actually gush would be a more accurate description. I was crying so hard that I could barely talk to the woman. She kept saying, "Amber, calm down. Be still. Stop crying it's New Year"

I'm thinking....."calm down, stop crying it's New Years??? Are you serious???" I have been home in almost 3 1/2 years, lady. My family has never seen my last three children. Are you serious?? Calm down??"

So for those of you who don't know, we have one more appointment with the board in Bangkok and then we wait for 6 months while being visited three more times.  After that the adoption is final on the Thai side. Joseph becomes ours in name and in authority in Thailand. 

AFTER that we wait two MORE years before America we accept our application to make him ours on the American side. We've gone through this whole loooooong process with Bank and we're finished with the two years on the American side in March. We praise God for that!

So for now, we wait.

When I hung up the phone, I couldn't stop crying. My heart was broken. My emotions are high right now as many of you women who've been pregnant can attest to.

Then I remembered something...... The Thai adoption center isn't in charge of my life. They don't dictate when we go home or how long we stay here. God's in charge. When God sees fit that we get that appointment, we'll get it. The End!

I look to the hills from which my help comes from; it comes from the Lord!

Love
amber